Strangers in the Night: Confessions of a Floh member

This is a blog post by Floh member, Shruti Sharma. Learn more at (a network that connects singles in real life)

Shruti Blog 3
(Floh members at an event hosted at Indigo, Mumbai)

I fondly remember a night in London (somewhere near Clapham), my last, and how some people came together to make it the best. I didn’t buy myself a drink that night. I didn’t need to. At any given time through the night, I had two men buying me drinks. A few weeks before that, I had been stranded at the Geneva airport. The airport was shut and there was no one there besides a British man who had missed his flight. Between the two of us we had 4 Swiss Francs (I wasn’t supposed to stay in Geneva), which he used to buy me water. Later, he wanted to buy me coffee as well, but the coffee never reached – long story.

This backpacking trip through a bit of Europe and the UK has been my only one outside India. Unfortunately, it ruined me for life. Somewhere along the way, I developed this romantic, idealistic, otherworldly desire to be approached by men (or to approach them myself), to buy each other a drink and have a soul-smacking conversation, which may or may not lead to something like a date.

Cut to back in India, for the last six years, being acutely aware of my idealistic desire to be approached by someone at a bar – and, it hasn’t happened even once.

Of course, I understand, considering Delhi’s cultural and psychopathological contexts, both men and women don’t feel safe approaching or being approached by someone. But that’s where Floh fit in perfectly for me – a set-up version of sorts of strangers meeting at a bar. I love the fact that on a given Sunday I can walk into a bar full of ‘screened’ strangers and share an activity with them, along with a drink or two and a few laughs.

Being surrounded by conversations about ‘you really must find someone and settle down’, ‘we don’t understand why someone as amazing as you is still single’ and ‘you poor thing, you will find someone’ that can break the confidence and good humour of the most solid ones, Floh has been an extremely welcome alternate.

Of course, this doesn’t mean that I only go to Floh events to meet strangers at the bar! I want to find a partner for life as much as the next person – it’s supposed to be the best thing there is, apparently. But in a world mired by a lot of negatives, as a single woman at 31, it’s nice to have one positive.

In a world where we are increasingly isolating ourselves (and subsequently moping about the loneliness); growing distant through our mobile phones and the ‘last seen’ indicator on WhatsApp; overthinking ‘He’s Just Not That Into You’ (I’m quite guilty of that myself at some point); nuclearizing our friends and family; in a Facebook-like world of ‘shallow friendships’ and disillusionment, it’s nice to come together in a snug little space once a month and meet some incredibly wonderful people going through the same struggles as you. Reminds me of a lovely quote from the movie ‘P.S. I Love You’:

“Thing to remember is if we’re all alone, then we’re all together in that.”

Here’s to all you wonderful people I’ve met through Floh – Salut!

If you liked this post, you might also like ‘What Floh Means To Me: A member tells us’

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  • pranjali

    Very nice post Shruti. Especially the last few paragraphs resonated really strongly with me.

    • sacredeastwind

      Glad you guys liked it :) Cheers, Pranjali, Ketaki and Akriti!

  • Ketaki Rituraj

    Totally agree with Shruti and Prajanli…. The last bits fit a lot of single women I feel

  • Akriti Sharma

    This is such a lovely post Shruti, thank you for writing it!

  • Ramanuj Mukherjee

    This article did strike a cord with me. You are a very good writer Shruti.

  • Priyanka Jain

    What a fantastic post Shruti. Cheers. My first day here, makes me feel have found just the right place:)

  • X

    Forget Delhi, you should see how so called socialite hep cats of Bombay who have studied lived abroad, been abroad and had flings abroad.. act lost when approached by someone who is not known to them or their circles.

    Wishful thinking, but today’s intellectual women spend too much time male bashing for their prince charming or just mr.charming for the evening to walk up without facing some kind of major rapist ‘witch’ hunt

  • Gaurav Sharma

    Indian women in cities are worthless lovers! They use you, seduce a rich guy on the side and call you a brother (or a friend), all thanks to the false “religious” image ordained by a false society. Go outside India, Indian men! There, women know how to love (I mean the heartfelt one, not just for money/sex), treat you like a man and not fake being a “sati savitri”.

    • Boss

      Someone had a bad date with the ladies, didnt he? Unless of course, you have actually dated every single Indian woman, in which case, I stand corrected.

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